I remember when we were kids, the adults used to lament about how we had to carry such heavy bags to school. Indeed, it often felt as though I had a baby elephant sitting on my back trying with all it's might to topple me over backwards. But it was still my baby elephant to carry. As I walked to the bus stop, in school and as I walked back home.
Today, as I dropped off my nearly 7 year old to a chess tournament, we got stuck waiting outside for half an hour because the room was waterlogged. After about 15 minutes, A turned to me asking if I'd hold his bag. My immediate response was no. It's his bag, he gets to hold it, except in cases of extreme exhaustion or injury. I was a bit stumped by his response "but all the other parents are holding their kids bags." I looked around to prove him wrong, but sure enough, all the other parents were holding their kids bags. Kids as old as my son or older. While furiously tapping their phone screens, scribbling in the forms or yelling at their child, all of them held on to their own bags and those of their kid or kids. There was a man walking around with three bags on his back while his children strolled leisurely, empty handed at his side. One father was making space for his 11 year old to sit while he stood. Another was organizing his teenagers bag, telling him where the pencils were. A harried looking mother was coaxing her daughter to take a sip of water. While yet another was giving last minute advice to her child about what to do or not do in the tournament.
As the announcement to enter was made, my son gave me a quick squeeze and said shoo, scat, scatat and was off. I told him simply to have fun. As I walked back home I couldn't help but wonder what had happened to parents. When did we become this breed of harassed, worried, stressed out zombies? When did we start treating our children like little entitled brats who can't carry their own bags for god's sake? When did a chess tournament become such a high stress activity, with parents milling about and prepping their children as though they are going in for their turn at the Olympics?
These are the same parents who will then moan about how spoiled their children are. But who spoiled them?
It's time we let kids be kids, and not treat them as royalty. Let your kid carry their own bags, make their own sandwiches, lose spectacularly at chess or football or whatever it is they play. It builds character. It teaches them to be independent. And it let's you have a life!
Today, as I dropped off my nearly 7 year old to a chess tournament, we got stuck waiting outside for half an hour because the room was waterlogged. After about 15 minutes, A turned to me asking if I'd hold his bag. My immediate response was no. It's his bag, he gets to hold it, except in cases of extreme exhaustion or injury. I was a bit stumped by his response "but all the other parents are holding their kids bags." I looked around to prove him wrong, but sure enough, all the other parents were holding their kids bags. Kids as old as my son or older. While furiously tapping their phone screens, scribbling in the forms or yelling at their child, all of them held on to their own bags and those of their kid or kids. There was a man walking around with three bags on his back while his children strolled leisurely, empty handed at his side. One father was making space for his 11 year old to sit while he stood. Another was organizing his teenagers bag, telling him where the pencils were. A harried looking mother was coaxing her daughter to take a sip of water. While yet another was giving last minute advice to her child about what to do or not do in the tournament.
As the announcement to enter was made, my son gave me a quick squeeze and said shoo, scat, scatat and was off. I told him simply to have fun. As I walked back home I couldn't help but wonder what had happened to parents. When did we become this breed of harassed, worried, stressed out zombies? When did we start treating our children like little entitled brats who can't carry their own bags for god's sake? When did a chess tournament become such a high stress activity, with parents milling about and prepping their children as though they are going in for their turn at the Olympics?
These are the same parents who will then moan about how spoiled their children are. But who spoiled them?
It's time we let kids be kids, and not treat them as royalty. Let your kid carry their own bags, make their own sandwiches, lose spectacularly at chess or football or whatever it is they play. It builds character. It teaches them to be independent. And it let's you have a life!
